Waitress: "Hey, do I know you? Did I work with you?"
Me: "No, I don't think so."
Waitress: "Are you (some guy's name)'s sister?"
Me: "Nope."
Waitress: "Are you sure?"
Guy I worked with first time I met him in the break room, just him and me...
Guy: "Are you Brandon's brother?"
Me:(look at him and go back to eating)
Guy:"You're Brandon's brother right?"
Me:(look of disbelief and a little, are you stupid?) "I'm Brandon's s..."
Guy: "Sister right! Sorry!"
Got my hair cut short, will never do it again, here's why:
Girl: "That's a cute pregnant lady haircut."
Stupidity. Why?!
I wore stirrup pants and flourescent colors...with permed hair and glasses that were too big for my face. Why? It was the 80's.
I fell at the Tandy center going up the steps...then fell again the same day when I was leaving. Why? Humility?
I ripped my pants at work one day...thankfully when there was only 5 minutes of the day left. Why? I don't know, there was no wear and tear, my pants just decided to fail me.
I once got trapped in the shower in the dorm room and had to be helped out of there by my suitemate who I'd only met the day before. Thankfully, I had put my towel over the shower door and not by the sink. Why? Because these things happen to me.
I once got hit on by a guy that referred to himself as "Big Sexy." Why? Not sure, ask him.
I once tripped over the hose at the gas station while pumping gas and jacked up my gas tank. Why? Because a huge "Silence of the Lambs" size moth was trying to get into my car.
Why do these things happen to us? Only one answer...God truly has a sense of humor.
Hahaha, these made me laugh! My favorite one is the story about the moth :)
ReplyDeleteGlad you liked it, gotta laugh at yourself sometimes.
ReplyDeleteOh my these are wonderful! I love the You're brandon's brother right? WHAT THE HELL MAN!?!? That's what I think I would have said to him.
ReplyDeleteOh and Big Sexy... really? I've had my share of weird people hitting on me. My fav... I was working at the Credit Union and this guy told me that he just got a paraphernalia ticket the night before and then THREW his number at me on a little piece of paper that hit me in the face... but he ran off so he didn't see it hit me. What a turn on? Tell me you do drugs and throw ur # at me! Good one dude. I still see him b/c he's worked at like EVERY restraunt in the area. I laughe very time I see him.
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